Love Me
by MaryRussellgrl
Summary: Sara notices that Grissom is looking at her differently.
1. Chapter 1

Grissom made me become his test dummy one shift. I was already doing work on my own case when he asked me to help him.

"What do you want me to do?" I asked

"Lie down on the sheet." He said

I looked down at the clean white sheet on the floor. He motioned me down. I sighed wondering how long this was going to take. I laid down looking up at him. He seemed to be working things out in his head.

"What now?" I asked

He walked away getting something then he came back kneeling down straddling my body.

"Grissom!" I said

"Ssh." He said

I felt a tingle go through me as he leaned over tearing off some duct tape. He put it over my mouth then he grabbed my arms duct taping my wrists. I watched him put his hand over my nose and mouth gently thinking.

"He would have covered her face like this and then waited." He said, looking at his watch. I waited in silence. "Sara, struggle."

I moved as he held me.

"Stop." He said

I laid still as he sighed looking down at me.

"She must have struggled and then after a few minutes stopped."

I moaned wanting to be let loose. Grissom took off the tape as he moved off me sitting beside me. I rubbed my wrist sitting up. Grissom looked at me as I looked at him. I thought he was thinking still, but the way he was looking at me made me think otherwise. Our heads were near each other's.

"Are you done with me?" I asked

He recovered standing. He helped me up looking at me again.

"Uh yes." He said, looking down.

I left thinking that was weird that he was looking at me like that.

The next week I went to a closet door in the lab opening it to get some supplies. As the door shut I tried to open it again realizing I was locked in. Sighing, I pounded on the door. When no one came I went for my cell phone only to discover it was not in my pocket. I groaned pounding again.

Grissom walked out from his office seeing Nick walking by.

"Nick, have you seen Sara?"

Nick shrugged his shoulders.

"Not for an hour. She said something about needing supplies."

"Thank's." Grissom said, walking down the hallway to the closet. He looked around not seeing me.

I held myself on the floor feeling claustrophobic. Looking over, I saw a shadow of someone standing beside the door. I slid my hand under the door trying to get the attention of the person.

Grissom sighed getting out his cell phone looking down at it. His eyes caught sight of my fingers under the door. He put his cell phone away touching the handle trying to open it. It was not working. Grissom tried pulling it, but it was not working. He hit the door.

"Sara?"

I pounded almost near tears.

"Help me!"

"I can't open the door. I am going to get you out!"

"Please help me!"

Grissom got his phone out calling for help. I hit the door crying as I tried to keep it together. Grissom knelt down while he waited reaching under the door waiting for me to touch his fingers.

"Honey, I am getting you out." He said

I pounded on the door screaming.

"Calm down." He said "Touch my fingers."

I looked down wiping my tears with my hand. He sighed as I touched his fingers. He sat down on the floor allowing me to touch him.

I closed my eyes laying my head against the door.

"Talk to me, Gris."

"You just need to relax." He said

"It's to small!"

"You just need to think about something else." He said

He looked at his watch then he looked at the door. I opened my eyes looking around the lit room I was in. I felt his fingers leave mine.

"No…..Grissom?!" I shouted "Please don't leave me!"

"Sara, I am here. Calm down."

"I can't…..please get me out!"

"Sara!" Catherine called, knocking.

"Where is Grissom?"

"He's talking to Ecklie."

"I…I can't….breathe!" I said, breathing harder.

"Sara, close your eyes!" She said

"I…please!"

"Sara, do it!"

I slowly closed my eyes trying to picture myself anywhere else.

Grissom walked over to where Catherine was by the door.

"She is freaking out in there." Catherine said

"I called the locksmith." He said, looking at his watch.

Catherine tried the door, but it would not budge.

I drifted away from the situation. Jumping as Grissom knocked.

"Sara, you okay?"

I shook looking around.

"Sara?"

"Gris." I said, gently touching the door feeling tears come down my cheeks.

He knelt down reaching under for me. I reached down touching his fingers.

"You just need to hang on." He said

I sniffed nodding.

"Let's talk about what you ate at break." He said, looking over at Catherine talking to Nick.

"I didn't have anything to eat." I said

"Why not?"

"I wasn't hungry." I said, sniffing.

"I ate a sandwich and a pickle." He said

I smiled a little as I touched his fingers.

"You hate pickles."

"I thought I would try it."

I closed my eyes wishing I was out in the hallway.

"How are you holding up?"

"I am tired."

"Did you sleep last night?"

"No, nightmares."

"You've been having those a lot lately."

I laid back against the wall.

Catherine walked over with Nick.

"Grissom, Nick has a crowbar in his car."

"Get it."

Nick nodded running. Catherine touched the door as Grissom continued to touch my fingers.

I closed my eyes wanting to sleep. My fingers left his as I let sleep hit me.

"Sara?" He called "Sara, can you hear me?"

He stood looking at Catherine.

"Sara?" Catherine called

Nick ran in with a crowbar. He wedged it in the door pushing. Grissom watched him try with all his might.

"It's not budging!" Nick said

Grissom tried seeing that the door was not going to open. He sighed letting the crowbar fall to the floor. Catherine got on the phone yelling at the locksmith.

Grissom touched the door worried about me. I drifted breathing slowly not hearing them calling my name.

The lock smith appeared working on the door. Grissom paced as he waited. Catherine watched him pace. The man stood breaking off the lock opening the door. Grissom knelt by me as I laid back against the wall. He took my hand rubbing it.

I moved opening my eyes seeing him.

"Can you hear me?" He asked

"Grissom?"

He sighed watching as I moved.

I was taken to his office where I sat on his couch drinking a can of pop he got me. He stood watching my every move.

"Feel better?"

I nodded drinking more. I stood on my shaky legs walking over to throw away the can in the recycling bin that he had beside his desk. I turned facing him feeling self-conscious that he was looking at me.

"I'll finish up." I said

He moved out of my way. I walked to the door feeling his hand touch my arm. I turned as he came into my personal space.

"Are you okay to work?"

"I think so."

"If you're not, it's okay."

He searched my eyes as I searched his. I felt his hand come down to my hand. He was looking at me as he did in the lab. I took a slow breath trying not to look at his lips.

"I….good."

He didn't move as I shook. I felt an urge to kiss him. I doubted if he would push me away. I let my eyes go to his lips. The only noise in the room was the central air in the room.

"Grissom?" I said

"Yes?" He said, gently.

"Do you….?" I said, still looking at his lips then I went to his eyes.

"Do I?"

I searched his eyes seeing that he wasn't afraid, or nervous. I moved my head closer.

"Can I….?"

"What?" He asked

Our lips were just inches apart. I trembled excited that this was going to happen. He still made no move to escape.

Seeing as how he wasn't going to make the first move I decided I would. My lips grazed his then after a second I began to move closer firmly touching his lips with mine. He moaned as I slowly moved my lips across his.

We didn't touch each other. I didn't know this, but Grissom was a fantastic kisser. His lips were soft and warm on mine. He moaned again this time taking the lead. I felt his hands move to my waist. I moaned as he pulled me even closer putting his hand at my shoulder blades.

A knock at the door made Grissom move back looking at the door then he looked at me. He let me go and I sat down reeling from what happened. He opened the door walking to whoever was there then he shut it looking at me. I looked at him seeing that his lips were swollen like mine felt. I stood letting go of the couch.

"Sara."

"You don't have to say anything."

"Don't I?" He asked, watching me fidget.

"No, because I know what you're going to say."

"What am I going to say?" He asked, coming closer to me.

"You're going to say that it was a mistake and you don't know what to do about it."

He stared at me as I looked at him.

"It's okay; I initiated this so you don't have to say that."

"I wasn't going to say that."

"What do you mean?" I asked, feeling my heart race.

He opened his mouth to talk when the door opened and Catherine appeared.

"Gil, I need to see you."

Grissom looked at her then at me. He walked out leaving the door open. I took a shaky breath walking out.

I didn't see him after that. I went home constantly thinking about the kiss. Even my dreams were about it.

Walking into work I was troubled. I went to the locker room getting my stuff. Leaning my head against my closed locker door I closed my eyes. The door came open and I lifted my head seeing Warrick. He patted my shoulder walking past. I opened the door walking out bumping into Grissom.

"Sorry." I said, getting out of his way. He watched me walk down the hallway then he went inside.

I went to work on my case distracted. I went to the vending machine in the hallway getting some chips. As I rounded the corner something large and strong threw me back hard against the floor. As I hit the floor my head cracked against the tile causing me to see stars. My bags of chips were everywhere.

"Sara, I am so sorry." Warrick said, as he held a dummy in his arms.

"It's all right." I said, shaking my head as he helped me stand.

"You okay?"

"I'm fine." I said

He nodded watching me. I looked down at the chips then I touched my head feeling a knot starting.

Grissom walked over looking at the mess then he looked at us.

"I accidently bumped into Sara." Warrick asked "I was running to the garage."

"I am okay." I said, looking at Grissom as he looked at me concerned.

"Warrick, we will talk later about this in the meantime go to the garage. I will take care of Sara."

"Thank's." Warrick said, leaving.

"Gris, I am fine." I said

"Did you hit your head?"

"A little."

He reached up touching my head.

"You have a knot here."

I nodded as he stood back looking at me.

"Do you need a doctor?"

"No."

He nodded looking down at the chips. I watched him walk over to the vending machine putting money in to get a new bag. He handed them to me.

"Thank you." I said

He nodded silently watching me walk away.

My head started throbbing and got worse after work. I walked over to my car winching at the pain.

"Sara?"

I turned seeing Grissom walking out leaving for the night as well.

"How's the head?" He asked

"It's fine." I said

"Does it hurt?"

"A little." I said

He looked over at the row of parked cars then he looked at me.

"Why don't I drive you home?"

"Oh, you don't have to do that."

"I want to."

"Okay."

He smiled taking me to his car. I sat in the passenger side looking at him as he drove. He glanced at me before looking at the road.

"What's wrong?"

"You never told me what you were going to say about…the kiss."

His jaw flexed as he looked at the road.

"What were you going to say?"

"I don't know." He said

I nodded looking outside.

"I liked it." He said

"What?" I asked

He glanced at me.

"I liked it."

"You liked it?"

He nodded as he looked outside again.

"Who are you?"

"I am Grissom."

"No, you're not." I said "The Grissom I know does not kiss women in his office, nor does he say that he liked it."

"Maybe I have changed."

"You can't change."

He turned onto my road.

"We all evolve, Sara."

He parked outside of my apartment building. I sat still as he looked at me.

"Do you want me to help you?"

"No."

He looked outside then at me.

"Sara, I still don't know what to do, but I thought about how this is affecting you and I."

"You and I?"

"Yes."

I looked down as he watched me.

"You said you and I."

I started to laugh rubbing my head.

"Is that wrong?"

"No, it's nice. I just never thought I would hear you say that."

He reached over touching my hand. I looked at him.

"Grissom, do you understand what a relationship is?"

"I do."

"There is touching involved, and kissing."

"Yes." He said

I slid over closer to him.

"You are going to have to be affectionate."

He pulled me closer to his face.

"Is there anything else?" He asked, gently.

I moved my head closer.

"You…have to…"

He kissed me before I could finish. I put my hand on his neck as he pulled me over closer. He moved his head with mine. I moved back breathing heightened.

"Will you stay?"

"If you want me to."

I kissed him again. He held my hand as we walked to my front door. I opened it looking at him. He nodded to me allowing me in first then he came in shutting the door.

I moved in bed later feeling for him. When I didn't feel his warm body I sat up not seeing him. I came out of my room and he was gone.

"Grissom?"

I walked over sitting on my couch feeling terrible.

At shift I saw him coming to meet me at the from desk area.

"Sara, can we talk?"

"I have to work."

"Please?"

I nodded following him. He led me inside his office then he closed the door.

"I am sorry, but I had to leave." He said

"I thought I dreamed it." I said

He put his hands on my cheeks.

"I didn't want you to think I just left."

"I understand."

"How's your head?"

"Sore."

He nodded letting me go.

"Do you need to take the shift off?"

"No, I'll be fine." I said, going to the door.

"Sara?"

I looked at him.

"Yes?"

"Becarful."

I smiled a little nodding before leaving. I worked without distraction. At break time I laid down on the breakroom couch closing my eyes to allow my head to rest. Greg walked in with Nick seeing me.

"Wow, she actually does sleep."

"I can hear you." I said

"Sorry." Greg said

I moved to my side as they talked by the coffee maker. I had fallen asleep because the next thing was Grissom was shaking my arm.

"Sara, you need to be working."

I moved sighing as I sat up holding my head in my hands. Grissom put his papers down on the coffee table then he sat down looking at me.

"You okay?"

I nodded lowering my hands then I stood as he did. He looked me up and down as I moved away.

After work I saw him walking with Brass talking about something serious. He glanced at me standing alone in the front desk area. He nodded at something the older man said then he glanced at me again. I looked down at my shoe tapping the floor. He waved at Brass then walked over.

"Going home?" He asked

"I think."

"You think?" He asked

"Yes." I said

Grissom shook his head walking over to me placing his hand on my arm leading me outside. He walked me to my car. I looked at him in the dim light. He looked around then he touched my waist I put my arms around his neck kissing him. He tilted his head grabbing at my lips. I moved from feeling his head rest on mine.

"Sara, I have a problem."

"You have problems?" I asked

He lifted his head smiling at me.

"I have a problem where you're concerned."

"You want to end whatever this is?"

"No, my problem is that I love you."

I dropped my arms looking at him in shock.

"Did you just say what I think you said?"

"Yes."

"Grissom…..you…you can't love me!"

"Why not?"

"Well…because…I."

"Do you love me?"

I opened my mouth looking at him.

"Grissom."

"Do you?"

"Don't make me answer that."

His hand went to my cheek.

"Do you?"

People came out of the building and we moved away from each other.

Grissom looked over at the people talking then he grabbed my hand pulling me to the side of the building. I let him go walking around as he watched me.

"I asked you a question." He said

"I know." I said "I just don't think you know what you're saying."

He sighed watching me pace.

"I am not the type that has long lasting relationships. I am dysfunctional, and I am a workaholic!"

He grabbed my arm pulling me to him.

"Sara, I know everything about you. You are not telling me anything I don't know."

I searched his eyes.

"Grissom, I can't do this."

I ran away back to my car as he watched me. When I got home I knew I was making a mistake, but he didn't know about my past and it scared me.

I avoided him for weeks. Every time he would look at me I would look away.

I noticed a woman one day wearing a suit walking with Grissom one day. She was talking to him and he smiled nodding as they walked towards me. He looked at me stopping. She stopped looking at me as well.

"Sara, did you get the results from trace?"

"Um…not yet." I said, looking at the woman.

"Hi, I am Terry Miller." She said

I took her hand shaking it.

"Sara Sidle."

Grissom looked at us with interest.

"Sara, get those results to me before you leave."

I nodded watching them walk way.

After shift I saw them getting into the same car driving off. Feeling jealous, I went home.

My head was swimming as I lifted up the empty bottle of wine from the floor next to the couch two hours later.

"You're empty." I said, trying to sit up instead I fell off the couch giggling. "Get up!"

I stood almost falling back. Carrying the bottle I made my way to the kitchen opening the fridge not seeing anything left. I groaned putting the bottle on the floor then I stumbled to the front door with my keys in my hand. I opened the door leaving.

The phone beside Grissom's bed rang. He moved reaching over putting it to his ear.

"Grissom."

He rubbed his face listening. He dropped his hand sitting up.

"What?" He said, listening. "Okay, I will be right there."

I slept in Brass's office on his couch as Brass stood at his desk looking at me. Grissom opened the door looking at him then at me.

"She is lucky that I was headed home. I pass right by her place. If I hadn't looked over seeing her fall down the apartment's front steps then who knows what would have happened."

"Thank you, Jim."

Brass nodded.

"She fought me all the way here, but I wanted her somewhere safe."

Grissom nodded walking over seeing I had a bruise on my head. He knelt down touching my head smoothing my hair back. I moved stilling as he continued to touch me. Brass watched this with interest.

"I'll take her home." Grissom said

"Are you going to suspend her?"

"I am going to talk to her."

Grissom took me to his house. He slid into bed beside me holding me scared at how close I could have killed someone or myself. I moved into his chest sleeping as he held me tightly.

In the morning I moved feeling a warm chest. I jumped up seeing him wake up looking at me.

"Grissom?"

"Good morning." He said

"What are you doing?!" I asked, looking around. "Where am I?"

"You are in my house." He said, sitting up.

"How did I get here?"

"I brought you home."

I winched at the headache I had.

"Sara, you drank last night and Brass brought you in."

I looked at him in shock.

"I was arrested?"

"No, he called me and I came in to bring you here so we could talk."

I laid down sighing closing my eyes. He watched me.

"Thank goodness." I said

"Sara, I am not going to lecture you because you don't listen, but I am going to make you talk to a counselor and make you take an extended vacation."

I sat up looking at him.

"Extended vacation?"

"Yes, you will take this time to think about if you want your job or not."

"You're going to fire me?"

"I never said that."

"Grissom, you know I won't do this again!"

"No, I don't know, but I do know you are on the edge." He said, standing.

I looked down at the blankets. He left the room closing the door.

I spoke to a counselor and went to San Francisco to do some searching. I came back two months later feeling ready to work.

Walking into the lab, I walked over to Grissom's office seeing a strange man sitting at his desk.

"Hello?" I said

"Hello." He said

"Um….I am looking for Grissom." I said, walking in further.

"Oh, you must be Sara." He said, standing. "I am B.D. Russell, Grissom's replacement."

My face lost all color as he said that.

"Grissom left?"

"Oh, he didn't tell you. He had an opportunity to do lectures in Washington."

I looked down then I looked back at him.

"Excuse me." I said

He watched me run out of the office. I went to the locker room sitting on the bench trying to understand what was happening.

Catherine came in seeing me. She sat down beside me touching my back.

"I wanted to tell you before anyone else."

"He's gone!" I said

She hugged me as I cried.

"Grissom loves you Sara. He will be back."

I shook unable to cope.

After that I was under Catherine's command. She never gave up hope that he would come and we would be together. I thought about my priorities and I wanted him back as well.

Grissom did come back after two more months. He smiled walking into the building happy to be there again. Catherine walked over hugging him then she leaned back eyeing him.

"You lost some weight." She said

He looked down at his trimmer figure.

"I decided to eat more salads."

"You look good." She said

"Thank's." He said

They walked around talking.

"So, how is Sara?"

"She's working in the garage. For a month after I thought we were going to lose her. She refused food and sleep, but after a talk we got her back on track."

He nodded looking at the garage door down the hallway.

"She is due for a break. Why don't you go see her?"

"I don't think that would be a good idea."

"Gil, she loves you."

He looked at her.

"She said so to me."

"Really?"

"Yes."

He looked back at the door feeling Catherine push him. He walked over looking back at Catherine who motioned him to go in. He sighed opening the door hearing noise in the large room. On the floor were pieces of a car with tags on them. He smiled looking at everything. He jumped when something fell looking over seeing me standing by the car I was working on in overalls. He stared at me in silence for a few minutes.

"Hello Sara."

"Grissom." I said

He smiled at me as I looked like I was going to cry. He watched me walk over carefully then throw my arms around him. He held me against him. I sniffed moving back kissing him. He kissed me back. I moaned kissing him longer. He moved back looking at me.

"I'm glad your back." I said, my voice breaking.

He put his hands on my cheeks.

"Me to."

He took me to his house after work. I kissed him in his bed. We both laid down with our clothes on. I kissed him slowly then I laid back on the pillow looking at him. He touched my cheek.

"I love you." I said

He smiled faintly.

"I love you to."

I moved closer putting my head in his chest. I woke to an empty bed. Moving, I got up walking out to the living room seeing Grissom in work clothes talking on his phone. He looked at me as I touched my messed hair. I walked over feeling his arm going around me.

He hung up and leaned down kissing my neck.

"I need to drive you home." He said

"Mmhmm."

"Are you okay?" He asked

I nodded touching his shirt. He kissed my head then let me go to get ready.

We went to the lab together as a couple. Grissom walked with me to the door with his hand on my back. He opened the door and we walked in seeing Russell and Catherine waiting at the door.

"What's up?" Grissom asked

"Ecklie needs to see us." Catherine said, she looked over at me smiling knowing we were together. I smiled then walked away happy.

After work I saw the three of them again in Grissom's office talking. I wondered what was going on. Grissom saw me and motioned me inside with them.

"Hello Sara." Russell said

"Hello."

"Ah Sara, there is something we need to discuss." Grissom said

"Okay."

"Ecklie has decided to make all three of us nightshift supervisors." Grissom said

I looked at them.

"Really?"

"Yes, and he said I can't work with you on my team due to our new…relationship. So we have decided that you will be with Russell."

I looked over at Russell.

"But…don't I have a say?"

"Not in this instance." Grissom said

I walked out with Grissom to our cars. He noticed my unhappy face. Taking my hand he took me to the side of the building.

"Honey, I know you want to be with me, but we can't."

"I know."

"Russell is a good man. I picked you for him because I know you will get along with him."

I nodded looking down. He hugged me.

The scenes were dealt with faster with three groups. Greg and Warrick went to Catherine and Nick went to Grissom. We worked with new recruits teaching them.

One night a month later had all of us working at scene a park. It was sad to see the body bags piling up. A celebration on that day brought people from all around then a bomb exploded bringing the celebrating to an end. I walked over seeing a little girl being put in a bag.

Russell walked over looking at what I was looking at.

"I hate this person all ready." I said

"We'll catch them." He said

I nodded disgusted that anyone would kill children. We worked the scene and then took breaks. I drank from a bottle of water standing by the cars. I watched the others walking around. Grissom walked over.

"Hey." He said

"Hey." I said

"Taking a break?"

I nodded drinking more water.

"We should be leaving in a few hours."

I looked at him.

"Okay."

He motioned me with him. We walked over to some trees.

"Russell said you were upset."

"Aren't you?"

"I am, but I know you tend to take on cases."

"I want to find this guy, Grissom!"

"Honey, I know, we all do. You need to stop taking it personally."

I hugged him feeling him hug me.

"Just don't shut down." He said

"I won't."

He let me get back to work. When it was over we went back to the lab handing in evidence then Grissom took me to his place. He held me in bed sleeping. His lips went to my head causing me to move against his chest.

"Gris?"

"Hmm?"

"You can't sleep?" I asked

"I just wanted to hold you." He said

I moved closer.

"Go to sleep." I said

He sighed closing his eyes then he opened them. He had a feeling something was going to happen. All he could do was hold onto me hoping that whatever it was would not take me away from him.


	2. Surrender

I sighed as it was slow week at the lab. All the latest scenes were being taken care of and I was on standby in the lab. It had been a month since the three supervisor shifts started and everyone seemed happy about it.

Grissom seemed to enjoy Russell and Catherine. I got to know Russell better and he seemed to enjoy my company.

I walked into Grissom's office not seeing him. I thought he must be at a scene, but his door was open. Sitting at his desk I closed my eyes laying my head back. The lab was silent except for the occasional sound of machines running tests.

I put my feet up on his desk sinking into the chair keeping my eyes closed. Grissom came in stopping as he saw me. He walked over putting his papers down on his desk then he touched my arm on the chair. I jumped seeing him.

"I see your enjoying my desk."

I smiled swinging the chair a little as he looked at me. He pulled me up smiling at me. I searched his face becoming serious as he did.

"I suppose I should go back to work." I said

"Me to."

I breathed slowly moving my eyes to his lips.

"What are you thinking about?" He asked

I opened my mouth to answer as Catherine knocked causing us to step back looking at her.

"You two look serious."

"Not at all." Grissom said

"I better go." I said

He nodded watching me leave.

We went home after work. Grissom opened my car side door helping me out. As I stood he put his arm around my waist kissing me deeply. I felt my toes tingling. He made sure I was satisfied. He moved back as I opened my eyes looking into his.

"Is that what you were thinking earlier?"

I smiled as he watched me.

"Yes."

"I had a feeling you were."

I reached over touching his cheek.

"I like it when you kiss me."

He sighed looking around.

"We should eat something and then go to bed."

"I am all for sleep."

He nodded taking my hand leading me to the house. He woke jumping some seeing me dressed for work leaning over him.

"You're going to be late for work." I said

He sighed stretching looking at me.

"I better not be."

I leaned down kissing him then I left the room. He dressed coming out to the living room seeing me waiting.

"Coffee?" He said

"Coffee." I said, handing him a to go cup with hot coffee inside. He sipped it as we walked out.

We came to work and Russell gave us our assignments. I went on a solo crime scene at a gas station on the outskirts of town. Brass walked with me inside looking at the grisly crime scene. People laid on the floor some had guns beside them.

"Wow!" I said

"Yeah." Brass said

I looked around sighing knowing I was going to be there awhile. I spent time going over each victim then I collected evidence making my way to the Tahoe. As I closed the doors in the back someone grabbed me from behind. A gun was pushed into my temple.

"You a cop?" The man asked

"No!" I said

"What are you?"

I looked over seeing two cops come out of nowhere aiming their guns at us.

"I'll kill her!"

I closed my eyes feeling how shaky the man was.

"Just calm down." I said

"My brothers needed money!"

"Okay, I understand." I said "Everyone needs money."

The cops watched us silently as I looked at them.

"They got fired! Now their dead!" He shouted, crying.

"I am sorry about that, but shooting me will not bring them back."

"It might not, but it will make me feel better!"

He cried and I swallowed feeling my body shake. He shoved me forwards and I turned seeing him aim his gun at me. I jumped as a shot rang out and he fell to the ground. The cops ran over checking him as I stood looking down at the man.

I returned to the lab shaking still. Russell walked over seeing me walking towards him in the hallway.

"How did it go?"

"Ah….fine." I said

He watched me go by him feeling something was wrong. I took everything into evidence then I walked to Grissom's. I went to open his door seeing my hands shaking. I opened the door not seeing him.

He came around the corner seeing me walking over.

"Sara, how was the scene?" He asked

I stopped looking at him then I walked over putting my arms around him. He put his around me feeling me shaking.

"Honey, what's wrong?" He asked, in a worried tone.

I moved back looking him up and down.

"Everything is fine." I said

"Sara, what is going on?"

I shook my head touching his coat.

"It's fine now."

"Why are you shaking?"

"It's….nothing."

He watched me closely as I walked away.

Russell came into the lab I was in looking at me with concern. I looked at him then down as I wrote on a paper.

"Sara, are you all right?"

"Yeah." I said, nodding as I looked down.

He reached over taking my hand after he took the pen. I watched him look down seeing I was shaking still. I took my hand away looking at him then down.

"Look, I am fine."

"You're shaking." He said

"It's…..fine."

He watched me in silence.

"I was informed about what happened. I would not be fine if it happened to me."

"Don't tell Grissom. Please."

I looked at him as he looked at me.

"Will you?"

"No, I don't want him to worry."

"He already is."

"I know."

He sighed looked down at the floor.

"I won't tell him."

"Thank you."

"If you're not okay, I want to know."

I nodded as he touched my arm then walked out. Grissom walked out seeing me next to the car as shift ended. I watched him come over to me. I tried to be normal, but he wasn't buying it. He searched my eyes.

"Are you ready to go?" I asked

He didn't say a thing.

"Grissom?"

He looked down taking my cold hand in his. I looked down at his on mine then he looked at me.

"I love you. Do you know that?"

"Yes."

"I would do anything for you."

"I know."

"That being said I….."

"I am really hungry." I said

"That being said I think you owe me some explanation."

"Grissom, its fine."

"What is fine?"

I sighed closing my eyes.

"I am." I said, opening my eyes looking into his.

He nodded.

"Really." I said

He flexed his jaw as I waited.

"Are you hungry?" He asked

"Um….not really."

"Okay."

I watched him go to his side and get in. Later I stared at the darkness in the bedroom as Grissom slept beside me. He moved and I looked over at him then I moved over laying my head against his chest. The next day I slept in as he drank his coffee in the living room dressed for work. He worked at his desk as someone knocked at the door. He got up closing the bedroom door then he went to open the front door seeing Russell.

"Russell, come in." Grissom said

"Thank's." He said, coming in.

"Coffee?" Grissom asked

"Yes."

Grissom went into the kitchen pouring him a cup. Russell walked in taking it then he looked around.

"Sara here?"

"She's sleeping."

Russell nodded drinking.

"What brings you here?"

Russell sighed putting the cup on the counter.

"Gil, I am worried about Sara."

"Why?" Grissom asked

"I told her I would not tell you, but I have to. I know as a married man if my wife were in danger I would want to know."

Grissom looked at him alarmed. I moved in the bed seeing Grissom was missing. Getting up I went to the bathroom then I went to the living room still not seeing him. I got dressed walking out again. I went into the kitchen getting some coffee turning seeing Grissom standing at the door looking at me.

"Where were you?" I asked

He came in walking over to me.

"I went outside."

"You okay?" I asked

"Mmhmm." He said

I drank my coffee feeling something was wrong. We walked out to the car and he opened my door. I looked at him as he looked at me.

"Grissom, what is wrong?"

"Nothing."

I slowly got in as he closed the door. He got in starting the engine. We sat in silence as he drove. I watched him steer into the parking lot then turn off the engine.

He looked at me as I continued to stare at him.

"Ready to work?" He asked

"Yes."

"Let's go." He said

I got out as he walked to the curb watching me walk over. He put his hand on my back walking with me to the door. I started to leave him in the hallway, but he caught my arm motioning me to his office. I stared at him as we walked. He let me go first then he closed the door. I backed up as he walked over putting his things on the desk. I took a breath as he moved to me touching my arms kissing me. I moaned as he pulled me closer.

He moved back touching my cheeks with his hands. I blinked watching his gaze soften.

"You're scaring me." I said

He nodded as he looked at me.

"Sara, I know what happened."

"How?"

"That's not important. I know also why you didn't tell me."

"Grissom, I…I just..."

"You don't have to explain." He said "I keep thinking about that time when you were being held by Adam Trent. I was so scared at the thought of losing you."

"I know."

"Honey, don't you see that I want to know good or bad. I care about your safety."

"I just don't want you to worry."

"You can't stop me from doing that. I worry when you go to the breakroom. That's what a husband does."

I felt a tear go down my cheek.

"I'm sorry."

He pulled me against him. I laid my head down on his shoulder trembling. I moved back touching him as he rubbed my arms.

"Do you want to talk about it now?"

"No, I think I feel better."

"Okay."

I left him thinking about what he said. Russell helped me with my case then I came back to Grissom's office. He put hand on my arm leading me to the front door. Greg and the gang walked over asking us to eat a breakfast with them. Grissom looked at me and I nodded. We went to a diner up the street. Grissom talked to Russell and Catherine as I drank coffee listening to Greg and the other's talking.

I looked over at Grissom as he listened to Russell. He smiled shaking his head looking down at his food. He chewed on some egg as he looked up again. I smiled faintly feeling Nick poke me. I turned looking at him.

"You are so obvious." He said

"What?"

He smiled looking at Grissom and at me.

"The way you are looking at him. Why don't you make out with him and be done with it?"

I hit his arm hard and he cried out. I looked outside chuckling.

Suddenly a loud boom outside made us all jump as Nick's black SUV blew up in a large fireball. The glass of the diner shattered and I heard screams as I launched myself over Grissom as we landed on the floor. Smoke in the air was thick. People started moaning in the diner as we started to move. Grissom looked around from the floor then he looked at me. I sat up looking around dazed.

"Nick, are you okay?!" Catherine shouted, as she moved over past me.

"Yeah." Nick said

"Warrick?!" She called next.

"Fine." He said, as he coughed.

"Greg?!"

I looked over seeing him laying back near Warrick against the wall.

"Greg, talk to me!" She said

"I'm here." He said, before groaning as he held his arm. She checked him as Grissom touched my cheek looking me over.

I nodded to him as he nodded back before moving over to Russell who was sitting up.

"I'm okay." Russell said

Grissom helped him up then he helped me dusting me off. He ran over to help the other people as Russell called for help. I looked outside seeing that Nick's car was on fire.

"What happened?" Nick asked, as he got up.

"Your car blew up." I said

"What?!" He said, looking out.

"It was a bomb." I said, calmly.

I sat outside looking down as the police walked around. Brass walked over kneeling down touching my arm.

"Hey." He said "How are you doing?"

"I'm numb."

He nodded understanding.

"Who did this?"

"I don't know."

I nodded looking over seeing Grissom walking around with Russell.

"I better go, are you sure you're okay?"

"Yes."

He nodded getting up walking away. I shook thinking about the person who could be trying to kill us.

As I sat there a little bit longer shots started to ring out. I screamed as everyone ducked behind vehicles. Grissom threw himself over me as the police started shooting.

I screamed hearing a bullet wiz past us. Grissom got up pulling me behind a car. I felt him cover me with his warm body. I closed my eyes as the attack continued. Russell protected Catherine inside the diner as Nick, Greg, and Warrick ducked as well.

The shots seemed to last forever. Brass was yelling to his men then he talked over his radio nearby. I pulled Grissom closer shaking violently.

The shots stopped and it was silent again. Grissom looked over seeing Brass making his way over with his gun aimed. Grissom moved, but I kept him still. He looked at me touching my cheeks.

"It's okay." He said

I nodded even though I was in a daze.

"We are safe now." He said, gently.

I looked over seeing Brass walk over putting his gun away.

"We are clear."

Grissom nodded looking at him then at me.

"We can take you all home." Brass said

"Sounds good." Grissom said, as he helped me up. I clung to him feeling afraid. I was hoping nothing else was coming.

Brass had his men take us home. I watched Grissom shut the front door then he came to me. I felt his arms tighten around me as I shook against him.

He took me into the bedroom holding me on the bed. I stared at the wall as he kissed my head whispering soothing things.

Later I jumped up in bed breathing in and out fast. Grissom touched my back causing me to jump again.

"Sara, it's okay." He said

I climbed over him pulling him against me.

"We are safe." He said

I pulled him even tighter still breathing fast. He sighed holding me.

We went to work and I felt safer in the building. Grissom took me to his office. I sat down in a chair as he looked over his mail. Russell knocked coming in with a bandage on his head.

"Hey, you two okay?" He asked

Grissom looked at me then at him.

"I think so, how are you?"

"Great. I need Sara to help me."

I stood looking at him.

"No, I don't want to."

"Sara, go on. You're safe in here." Grissom said

"No, Grissom!"

"Russell, she'll meet you."

Russell nodded leaving. Grissom pulled me up against him.

"Honey, this place is very secure."

"I don't want to leave you." I said

He put his hands on my cheeks.

"You need to work. I have to work as well."

I searched his eyes.

"No one will harm us here."

"Please Grissom." I said

"Come on."

I felt him pull me along. We went down the hallway stopping at the lab room Russell was in.

"Go help him and I will check on you later."

I touched his arm as he looked in at Russell then at me.

"Go on."

He let me go watching as I slowly walked into the room looking back at him. He walked away and I felt alone.

A few hours later Russell was called in for a meeting. He left me to continue. I went on break seeing Greg sitting in the break room alone looking down at his uneaten sandwich on the table.

"Hey." I said

"How are you doing?" He asked

"Not good, you?" I asked, getting some coffee.

"I keep thinking about earlier." He said

"Me to."

"How's Grissom?" He asked, standing.

"He's calm as usual while I am the nut case." I said

He smiled faintly.

"Nothing new then."

I laughed before drinking coffee.

"I was worried about you." Greg said

"Me?"

"You had that scary shift with the guy then this."

I watched him throw his sandwich away then he walked out. Grissom walked in looking at me as he held a file.

"How's it going?"

"Fine." I said

He walked over seeing I had a tear coming down my cheek. I quickly wiped it away before drinking more coffee.

He touched my arm with his hand rubbing it.

"I'm fine." I said

"Okay." He said

"I should get back to work." I said

He watched me leave quickly.

I kept working right up to the end of shift. Grissom met me at the front desk.

"Honey, I am going to be late. Ecklie wants to meet with us about the bombing."

"I can wait." I said

"Brass will drive you home."

"I want to wait." I said

"I will be awhile. You need to go home and sleep." He said "Please Sara."

I looked at the front door then at him.

"How will you get home?"

"I have a ride."

"I don't think I can sleep."

"You can if you try." He said, smiling faintly.

I watched him go. He turned watching me stand there then he motioned me to leave. I sighed slowly walking to the door looking around then I walked out. Brass waited for me. He drove me home waiting till I got inside the house.

I tried to sleep, but seeing Grissom's side empty I just could not thinking about where he was. The front door opened and shut as I sat up listening. The bedroom door opened and I slid down laying on his side pretending to sleep.

It was dimly lit in the room as he walked around. I looked over watching him take his clothes off then he went to the bathroom. I rolled over to my side waiting. He came out in pajamas walking over getting into bed. He looked over at me then closed his eyes.

I looked over at him moving closer putting my arm over his chest.

He kissed my head sighing.

"I love you." He said, softly.

I didn't acknowledge him as I looked at the wall across from the bed.

He woke hearing something break in the next room. I looked at the bowl I broke on the floor and my hand that was bleeding after I tried to pick it up. Grissom came out seeing me.

"Sara, what happened?"

I didn't answer as I stared at the glass on the floor. He walked in seeing blood on the floor with the glass.

"Honey, what did you do?"

He lifted me up seeing my hand had a cut on my palm.

"This doesn't look good."

I looked at it then at him. He looked at me seeing I had glazed over eyes.

"Let's get you to the hospital."

I slowly nodded as he pulled me to the bedroom. He and I dressed and went to the hospital. I was stitched up and then we went to work.

He helped me out of the car waving at the policemen that followed us in.

"You look so tired and pale today." He said, worried.

I looked down as he took me inside the building. Once inside his office he sat me down on his couch kneeling in front of me.

"Sara, I think you should go back home."

"No, I want to be here." I said

"You're not going down without a fight are you?" He asked

I jumped as a knock at the door interrupted the moment. He stood walking over seeing Catherine. He came out in the hallway looking concerned.

"What's wrong?" She asked

"I am worried about Sara. I think she's going to have a breakdown."

"Who can blame her after what's happened." She said "I am sure she will be fine."

"I don't know. I have seen that look on her face before just before she left that time."

"You need to talk to her."

"I am trying."

She nodded patting his arm.

"Ecklie called and said that day shift uncovered a lead to the person responsible for the bombing and shooting."

"Who?"

"His name is Marcus."

"Marcus Sheltner?"

"Yes." She said "How do you know him?"

"I met him on a case two years ago. He blamed us for his wife and children's death."

"I remember that. You said that they were in a grocery store shooting."

"He thought that we caused the shooting after the gunman refused to negotiate. The police put pressure on him."

"He shot all the hostages, I remember." Catherine said "Why would he blame us?"

"I told him that I would help find the people responsible, but the evidence that we collected could not put the group away."

"So he blamed us and now he is taking revenge?"

"Yes, it appears so."

Grissom rubbed his head as Catherine looked at him.

"Headache?"

"Starting to be."

"Gil?" Russell called, walking over. "Hello Cath."

"Hey."

"Russell, I don't know if Sara can help you today. She is not doing well."

"I already have one of my team doing her case. Tell her I don't need her help tonight."

"Thank you."

Grissom came back in seeing I was sleeping on the couch. As he walked past I jumped up screaming waking from a nightmare.

Grissom ran over holding me. I cried against him as he rocked me back and forth.

"I want you to talk to someone." He said

"No."

"Sara, you are a mess right now. I think you're on the verge of a breakdown."

"No, I don't want to." I said, sniffing.

He sighed making his mind up.

I was sent to a counselor after that. Grissom watched me start to be my old self after a few weeks. I stopped being scared as Marcus Sheltner was found and brought to the station.

Grissom had better locks put in our home and an outdoor camera installed to make me feel safer.

I came back to work feeling secure and ready to work. Russell gave out assignments in the breakroom smiling at me as I walked by.

I went on a solo case to a house. The scene was straight forward and I was done within a few hours. I came back seeing Grissom leaving to go to a scene. He blew me a kiss then walked to the car. I went in starting to work.

I sat eating a sandwich in the conference room writing a report. Grissom came in with a female CSI from his team talking.

"Hey." I said

"Hey, do you mind if Dana and I are in here?" He asked

"No."

I smiled at them as they sat down at the other end talking about a case. Grissom opened the file showing her photos. She laughed as he talked.

I watched them a minute before going back to my report.

"I forgot something in my office." He said, standing. "I'll be right back."

"Okay." She said

He nodded smiling before looking at me then walking out.

She looked at the photos then looked over at me.

"He's cute isn't he?" She said

"Who?" I asked

"Grissom."

I looked at her then at the door.

"Yes, he is."

"I didn't get your name." She said

"Sara."

"Dana." She said

I smiled nodding before writing something down.

"He's really been teaching me a lot." She said

"That's what he does." I said

"I wish my boyfriend was more like him."

I looked at her as she smiled looking at the photos.

"Is he married?" I asked

"He has a ring on his finger." She said "To bad, I wouldn't mind a crack at him."

Grissom opened the door seeing both of us looking at him.

"I got the file." He said

"Great!" She said

Grissom sat down noticing me eyeing him. He gave me a look then helped Dana.

I got up to leave holding a note for him in my hand.

"Grissom, you dropped something." I said, bending over to pretend to pick up something. He watched me put the piece of paper in front of him then I walked to the door. He opened the note then he looked at me. I smiled walking out.

Later I came into his office seeing him at his desk. He leaned back smiling at me.

"Thank you for the warning." He said

"You better do what I told you, because I know Dana would try to put the moves on you if she could."

"She can try." He said

"She better not." I said, leaning against his desk.

He chuckled looking at me. I smiled taking his hand in mine.

"So how was work?"

"Good."

"I have been stuck in here doing paperwork."

"You need an assistant." I said

"Are you interested?"

"No."

"I don't think it's in the budget."

"I imagine if you kissed up to Ecklie he would let you."

"I can't see myself doing that, can you?"

"No, I have never seen you do that."

He pulled me to sit over him. I touched his lips with my finger tracing over them.

My eyes followed my finger. He put his hand on my hand lowering it so he could kiss me. His arms went around me as my arms went around his neck. He moved back feeling my lips find his neck. He kept his eyes closed laying his head back.

"Do you want to fool around later?" I asked

"Mmm maybe." He said

I leaned back looking at him.

"If you're tired we don't have to."

"I am tired, but I think I can manage it."

I unbuttoned two of his shirt buttons putting my hand inside. He sighed feeling my hand run over his smooth chest.

"You really like me tonight, don't you?" He asked

"Am I that obvious?" I asked

He smiled as I smiled letting my hand slip out of his shirt as I laid my head against his shoulder yawning.

"Why don't you go home and change?"

I slowly got up stretching.

"I suppose I could. I'll wait up."

He nodded watching me go. I waited as I read on the couch feeling tired, but I had to stay up. Grissom quietly came in walking into the living room seeing me on the couch sleeping on my stomach. He walked over shaking my back feeling me move.

"Hey, I am sorry I am late." He said

"Mmm." I moaned, getting up looking at him. "Ready?"

"Honey, you're tired." He said, touching my hair.

"I am ready."

He smiled as I walked past him to the bedroom. He walked in seeing that I was laying back on the bed snoring gently. He shook his head gently moving me to my side.

I woke seeing it was an hour till work. I got up seeing Grissom dressed reading the paper sitting on a stool at the kitchen counter with a cup of coffee beside him.

He lowered the paper looking at me as I put a hand through my hair. I walked over kissing his cheek then I went and got some coffee.

"Disappointed?" I asked

"No, you and I were both tired." He said

"I conked out early." I said

"It's okay."

I walked over to him touching his hair. He put his arm around my waist laying his head on my shoulder.

"You better get ready for work." He said

"Brush my teeth."

He nodded letting me go. I came out ten minutes later looking refreshed and ready to go. Grissom led me to the car getting in. He sat down in the driver's seat gasping as I moved over to his lap.

"Sara!"

I kissed him feeling his hands pushing me back.

"We are not doing this in the car!"

"You once told me that you would like to be spontaneous."

"Not out in the open!" He said, looking around.

"No one is around. It's just you and me." I said, putting my arms around his neck.

"We will be late for work!"

I sighed moving back looking at him. He looked at me.

"Sara, I don't want to do this here."

"Where do you want to do it?"

"At home."

I slowly moved off him sitting in my seat. He took a breath starting the engine looking down as my hand went to his leg.

We got to the lab and he gave me a warning look.

"What?" I asked, smiling innocently.

"You know what!"

I chuckled taking my hand away. He got out walking to the lab as I got out.

We didn't see each other again till I went on break. He walked down the hallway looking over some results as I walked past him. He looked over at me then down again. I glanced back at him then I walked on.

Russell pulled me out of the interrogation room after the man we were questioning tried to throttle me. He closed the door facing me.

"You okay?" He asked

I nodded touching my neck. He took away my hand so he could see. I looked over seeing Grissom with Greg walking over. I quickly took Russell's hand away acting normal.

"Hey, guys." Russell said

"Hey, how was interrogation?" Grissom asked

I shot Russell a warning stare.

"Good." He said

Grissom looked at us a moment.

"Well we should go." I said

"I am going to talk to Brass." Russell said, going back inside. I looked at Grissom and Greg as they looked at me.

I walked past them knowing their eyes were on me. Russell was in his office later when I came in shutting the door.

"Do me a favor from now on. If anything happens don't let Grissom know."

"Sara, I think he would want to know."

"No, I don't want him to. He worries and then his mother hen personality comes out. Please don't tell him."

He sighed moving back in his seat.

"You're putting me in a bad position."

"Please?"

"All right, but if he interrogates me I will."

I smiled nodding.

Grissom walked me outside to the car taking me home. He opened the door and I went in then he closed the door walking around. I went to the bathroom seeing some bruising on my neck.

I came out going to bed. Grissom came in looking at me.

"Is there something you want to tell me?" He asked

"No." I said

"Nothing?"

"No." I said

He walked away and I closed my eyes then opened them watching him undress. He turned off the light moving over me. I kissed him feeling his hands moving over my body.

Forgetting the bruises I let him take over.

The next week we were called to a horrible disaster. All three groups were called to work a two bus crash and some cars. Grissom shouted orders to his team as Catherine did the same. I stood near Russell as he gave our team orders.

"Make sure you check in with me if you have an issue. This is a big scene so work it safely." He said

I walked away knowing already where to go. I took two CSI's to the one bus on its side on the right. I took out my flashlight making my way inside.

I went through slowly looking at each seat seeing bags and other things against the left side.

"Okay, bag anything to looks like evidence." I said

"Take pictures of everything in here. We don't want to miss a thing."

"You got it." They said.

I got out looking around seeing CSI's all around. I went around the bus looking at the tires. Russell walked over.

"How's it look in there?" He asked

"There is lots of bags, and other things in side. I am having them bag evidence and taking pictures."

"Good." He said

I walked closer looking at the right side tire.

"Find anything?" He asked

I shined my light up inside.

"Not yet."

"Let me know." He said, before walking away.

"Okay." I said, still staring at the tire. "Warrick!"

He walked over looking at the bus beside me.

"What's up?"

"Can you help me up?" I asked

"Yeah."

I let him lift me up so I could get on top of the bus. I walked over carefully seeing the door to the luggage. I got it open and looked inside.

"Hand me my case." I said

He handed it up to me then walked away. I lifted a bag looking through it then the others.

Grissom watched me from the hill. I took pictures of the bags. I reached in getting another out. Opening it seeing large bags under some clothes. I took them out after taking pictures seeing that they were large bags with white powder inside.

"Wow!" I said

I opened my case getting the drug testing kit I had. I looked over seeing Russell using a ladder to come up and join me. He walked over kneeling down seeing the bags.

"Look at all this!" He said

"Yeah."

He watched me take some powder putting it in a test bag then I hit it with my finger seeing it was turning blue.

"Cocaine." I said

"How many bags?"

"Four big ones." I said

He looked inside the bag.

"A gun." He said

I looked in seeing a gun under the one bag sticking out. I took a picture of it then he got it out.

"Whose bag is this?" I asked

"We'll figure it out." He said

He took the bag down leaving me to search again. I finished with them then I walked over to look at the tires from above. I stood up looking at everyone on the ground then I looked behind at the trees. My flashlight shined on something below. I climbed down making my way into the woods. I walked over seeing a hub cap from a car. I took it looking around again. I walked around some more stopping to look down into the dark trees. A light shined on me as I turned holding my hand up to shield my eyes.

I looked at the person coming down seeing Grissom.

"Found something?"

"A hubcap." I said, showing him.

"From a car." He said

I nodded shining my light around.

"I hate dark woods." I said

"I like them."

"Shocker." I said

He smiled looking around them.

"The most sinister things happen in woods." He said

"You're creeping me out." I said

He watched me walk past him. I made my way up to the site turning to look back at him. As I did something sharp cut my leg.

"Owe!" I said, looking down seeing some old barbwire laying on the ground. It made my leg bleed. Grissom was coming and I went on my way.

I walked around three hours later helping other's bag evidence. I walked up the hill carrying bags to the Tahoe. I wiped my head walking back.

"Woah!" Russell said, blocking my path.

"What?"

"Did you take a break?"

"I don't need to."

"Sara, you need to take one."

"Russell, I am fine."

"No arguments."

"Please?"

He shook his head. I sighed walking back to sit the back of one of the Tahoe's. I laid back putting my arm over my eyes. I didn't feel the cut in my leg anymore causing me to think it had stopped bleeding.

I drifted faintly hearing the people working. There was someone that walked by then walked by again. I ignored them as I went to sleep.

Grissom walked around watching his team then he looked at this watch seeing Russell walking up the hill towards him.

"Is Sara on break?" He asked

"Not without a fight." Russell said "She has ten minutes."

Grissom nodded watching him walk past. Grissom walked slowly past the vehicles looking at each one seeing me half hanging out sleeping. He turned off his light looking at me then he looked down noticing my pant leg. Shining his light at it he saw a large blood stain. He set his light down seeing a hole near my knee.

He rolled it up gently seeing that blood had come down my leg to my shoe. I moved sitting up in alarm seeing him.

"What did you do to your leg?" He asked

I looked at it winching as he looked at the wound.

"I guess I snagged it on something." I said

"What?" He asked

"I don't know." I said, lying.

He went and got his immaculate first aid kit making me move back so my leg was lying down. I watched him clean my leg and wound then he expertly put the bandage over it.

"Thank's."

"Do you feel sick or dizzy?" He asked, looking at me with his doctor eyes.

"No." I said

I moved sitting with my legs hanging down. He closed his kit then he looked at me.

I pulled him between my legs kissing him. He kissed me back then he put his head against mine breathing out.

"You must be tired." I said

"I am." He said

I leaned up kissing him again. He moaned as I deepened the kiss feeling his body respond as his hands touched my cheeks.

I moved back seeing his blue eyes glow in the darkness.

"We better go back to work." I said

"Sara, I want you to know that I love you."

"I know you do."

His thumbs smoothed my skin.

I stood with his help hugging him.

"I love you." I said

"I know."

I smiled letting him go. He walked with me back to the site.

The sun came up and I yawned looking at the sky. We were done and packed up. The vehicles started to go as I walked with Grissom and Russell.

"Sara, do you want to ride with me?" Grissom asked

I rubbed my aching eyes.

"She had better go with you." Russell said

Grissom pulled me with him. Greg got into the back as I got in with Grissom in the front. He looked at me as he started the engine. I yawned again settling down.

"I am going home and sleep for days." Greg said

"That sounds like a good idea." Grissom said

Russell went first then Grissom down the road. I looked outside then I closed my eyes against the sun.

"You did a good job, Greg."

"Thanks." Greg said

Grissom looked over at me seeing I was already asleep. He took my hand rubbing it gently.

Later I moved feeling a blanket over me. Opening my eyes I saw I was in our bed. I looked over not seeing my husband. Closing my eyes again I moved to my side.

Grissom came in with a cup of strong coffee walking over putting it down next to my side on the table. He sat down touching my blanket covered hip.

"Sara?"

"Mmhmm?"

"Sara?" He said, again.

I didn't move.

"Sara?"

I groaned moving looking at him.

"I brought you some coffee."

I sat up slowly taking it. I drank it winching then I drank the rest. I put the empty cup down on the table looking at him.

"You look better." He said

"I'm so tired." I said, yawning. "How did we get here?"

"You were out of it. I carried you in and dressed you."

I looked down at my pajamas.

"I also put a new bandage on your leg."

"You were very busy."

"I still am." He said, getting up taking the cup.

I put my finger on my lips and he smiled leaning down kissing me.

"Get up, it's time for work." He said

I watched him go then I sat back thinking about the long shift awaiting us.


	3. Changes

Russell caught me as jumped down in the ditch with him. He let me go watching Dan, another CSI come down. I walked ahead shining my light inside.

"Ah, you guys."

They both looked in seeing three male bodies floating in the dirty water inside.

"Drowning." Dan said

"No, more like run over." I said, showing them the tire tracks over the one's chest. Russell walked in seeing the man then he looked at me shaking his head.

"This just gets weirder and weirder." He said

"I like these cases." I said

"I don't." Dan said, getting into his case.

"These men get run over and are thrown in here."

"Someone didn't want them found." I said, walking in to take pictures. "Unfortunately for them we did."

I gave the camera to Dan as I walked deeper into the drain pipe. I shined my light around not seeing anything. Russell walked in looking at the top of the pipe then back down into the water. I went around a corner.

"Sara?"

"Yes?" I answered, looking down the pipe.

He walked over seeing me walking slowly.

"Find anything?"

"Not yet." I said

He looked over seeing another pipe on the left side. I continued to walk looking down at the water then I looked at the walls.

The water seemed less deep as I walked. Russell walked over to the left. I stepped forward falling down with a splash. I coughed hearing him running over.

"Are you all right?" He asked, helping me up.

"I think so." I said, looking down at myself dripping with water. "I fell in a hole."

"Let's go back so you can change."

I nodded following him back. Dan looked at me as I walked over. He snapped a picture chuckling.

I glared at him then walked by. I changed into coveralls then helped with the scene. When I got back to the lab I changed into my spare clothes.

Grissom walked into the breakroom seeing me sitting at a table writing on a paper. He walked over touching a strand of damp hair. I looked at him.

"I heard you took a swim?" He said

"A little one." I said

He leaned over smelling my hair.

"Did you take a shower?"

"Mmhmm." I said, writing.

He sighed placing his hand on my hair smoothing it back.

"Hungry?"

"Not really." I said

He nodded moving away. I watched him get some coffee then he looked over at me before leaving. I watched him walk out.

I took my paper walking into the lab seeing Dan and Russell in lab coats working.

"Russell, there has to be evidence of an accident somewhere near the pipe." I said

"We looked." Dan said

Russell looked at me as if reading my mind.

"You want to go out again, don't you?"

"Yes, I do." I said

"Okay, we can both go. Dan run what we have."

"You got it." He said

I smiled as Russell walked with me.

"What?" He asked

"I think you are more like Grissom than you think."

"Hmm." He said

We drove back towards the area that we were in. Russell stopped the vehicle looking around.

I got out taking out my flashlight shining it on the road.

"I don't see any tread marks." I said

"None here." He said

I stopped sighing as I looked around. Russell stopped looking at me.

"It wasn't here."

"No."

"Okay, so if it wasn't here then where was it?" I asked, annoyed.

Russell looked over across the road seeing trees beyond the pipe.

"You know as we were here earlier I did see a narrow road between the trees." He said

I looked over then at him.

"Feel like a hike?"

"Sure you can keep up?" I asked, making my way over.

He smiled walking with me.

Grissom walked down the hallway after a meeting. He saw Dan walking over looking worried.

"Mr. Grissom, have you heard from Sara?"

"No, I haven't seen her." He said

Dan nodded pushing on his cell phone putting it up to his ear.

"I am worried, Russell isn't picking up either."

"Where are they?"

Dan put his cell phone away.

"Sara wanted to go back to the scene."

Grissom nodded getting out his cell phone. Brass drove over stopping as he saw the Tahoe parked on the side of the street. He had some cops with him as he walked over looking inside it.

"Search the area." He said

He took out his cell phone calling Grissom.

"Gil, its Jim. No sign of them yet."

"Got something!" One of his men shouted.

"I'll call you back." He said, running with his officers to the trees. He ran where the cops was shining a light to the left. Brass stopped seeing a body down the hillside.

He made his way down kneeling to see who it was.

"Russell?" He called, moving his friend over to his back. Russell jumped awake clutching Jim's arm.

"Sara!" He shouted

"It's okay, we will find her!" He said, getting his phone out.

Russell sat up breathing in and out fast winching as he touched his head feeling a cut.

Jim hung up the phone looking the man over.

"Russell, where is Sara?"

"We were walking, and a truck tried to run us over. I woke up here."

"Okay." He said, then he turned to his men. "Fan out, look for her!"

"Help me to stand." Russell said

"You should stay here."

"Help me!"

Brass gave up helping the man. Russell winched again, then he walked up to the road.

"There was a vehicle driving through here recently." Brass said, looking at the fresh tracks.

"Captain!"

"Stay here." Brass said, running farther along the road. He saw me before he got there. I laid on my side on the left side of the road. A large bruise was on my head with a cut. Brass gently touched my neck feeling a pulse.

"Sara?" Russell called, running over.

He knelt down to me looking at Brass.

"She has a pulse." Brass said

Russell felt my body for broken bones.

"She doesn't have any broken bones."

He gently rolled me over to my back looking at the bruise. Sirens could be heard coming closer.

"Let's get her to the hospital." Brass said

He motioned to one of his men to pick me up as he walked with Russell to the street.

Grissom came into the hospital. I laid in a bed with a bandage on my head looking around with glazed eyes. He walked over kissing my head.

"Hey."

I closed my eyes laying my head against his stomach. He touched my head as the doctor came in.

"Are you Mr. Grissom?"

"Yes, how is she?"

"She has a mild concussion and some memory loss."

"Is that temporary?"

"Yes, she should be back to normal soon. I would let her rest here for a few days then she can go home."

"A man was brought in with her. How is he?"

"He has been released. He will be fine."

"Thank you."

The doctor nodded before leaving. Grissom pulled a chair close to the bed touching my hand as I looked at him.

"Grissom?" I said, in a sleepy voice.

"Yes?"

"What happened?"

"I don't know." He said

I closed my eyes then opened them again.

"You and Russell had an adventure."

"Who is Russell?"

"You need to sleep."

I moved my head closing my eyes. He sighed looking at me.

I came home a few days later sleeping. Grissom came home after shift hearing the TV on in the living room. He came in seeing that I was sitting on the couch reading a science journal.

"How are you doing?" He asked

"Good."

He nodded sitting down beside me. I put the journal on the side table then I moved over putting my head against his chest.

"Russell came by and asked me how you are doing?"

"I don't know who that is." I said

"He is your boss."

"Oh, what did you tell him?"

"I told him you were still a bit foggy."

I nodded looking to the side. Grissom worried that I could still not remember things. I came to work the next week walking with Grissom seeing a man with a small cut on his head walk over.

"Sara, I am glad to see you."

I opened my mouth to say something, but Grissom intervened.

"Sara, this is Russell."

I looked at the man as he looked at Grissom then at me concerned.

"Your memory is still gone?"

"Yes, but it's getting better."

"Great, why don't we try to bring it back?"

I nodded as he put his hand on my arm leading me away. He tried to help me as we worked together. I trusted him and I didn't know why. At break I went to lie down on one of the beds in the rest room down the hallway from the breakroom.

As I slept all these pieces of memory came out. I faintly felt someone kiss my head moving my hair back. I laid still having no energy to move. Grissom sat down on the bed across from mine.

"Honey?"

I slowly opened my eyes seeing him. His hand continued to smooth my hair back.

"Hey." I said

"You okay?"

"Did Russell send you in here?"

"He was worried."

"I'm fine."

He smiled.

"I see you are back to I am fine."

I slowly sat up yawning feeling him move over sitting beside me.

"How is your head?" He asked

"It's aching." I said

"I can get you some pills." He said, standing. I stood feeling him kiss my head.

"Russell, what if Grissom comes in?" I said

Grissom moved back seeing a smile on my face.

"Very funny." He said

"He is very handsome."

"So you're trading up?" He asked, taking my hand leading me out in the hallway.

"I would never do that. You're the cute one."

He chuckled walking with me. Russell saw me come into the room he was in.

"Good sleep?" He asked

Grissom walked in leaning on the door watching me.

"Yeah." I said, before scratching my head. "Russell, did you tell Grissom what happened to us yet?"

They both looked at me.

"What happened?"

I looked at him.

"Yes, on the road?"

"You remember?"

I nodded seeing Russell's lips turn up in a smile.

"Sara, your memory is coming back!"

I looked over at Grissom as he smiled.

"I felt clearer as I woke."

"What did happen?" Grissom asked

"We were walking along the road. A truck came with a broke head light. He didn't stop."

"You both were hit by a truck?"

"I grabbed Sara and pulled her out of the way." Russell said

"It clipped me and I fell."

"Do you remember what the truck looked like?" Russell asked

"White, I think."

"That's right." Russell said

I smiled nodding. It wasn't long before I remembered everything.

Brass scoured the town looking for that one truck. He found it within a two days bringing the man in. Russell and Dan handled the interrogation as I listened behind a window. Grissom walked in seeing me intently watching.

"Is that your guy?" He asked

"Yes."

He nodded handing me a file.

"Give that to Russell when he comes out."

"What is it?" I asked

"It's an old case that he wanted to look into."

I looked at him confused. He looked at me touching my nose before leaving. I opened the file seeing something I shouldn't have.

Russell came out seeing me looking upset holding the file.

"Why are you looking at this?" I asked, holding out the file.

He took it looking inside.

"Sara, I am looking into this because it is important."

"I can't go back to that. I saw that girl die!"

"I need you on this."

"I am not going to go through that again!"

He watched me walk away.

Later, I came into Grissom's office upset still. He watched me sit in a chair in front of his desk looking down.

"Russell want's to open the case involving Mary Watts." I said

He sat back in his seat looking at me.

"I told him I would not help him."

"You're letting yourself get upset." He said

"I watched her die, Grissom! I held her hand while she uttered her last words."

"I know you did."

I wiped tears from my cheek.

"Why is he doing this?"

"There have been new developments."

I stood sighing looking at him.

"Well he can do this without me."

"Sara, come here."

I walked over sitting over his lap.

"Honey, I know how this case hurt you, but if this new development does turn out to be anything then we can get the guy responsible."

I looked at him.

"We can put this case to rest and then you can stop regretting."

"You want me to help him, don't you?"

"I think you should do what you want to do."

I stood with his help thinking. He watched me walk to the door stopping as I looked at the doorknob.

"What's wrong?" He asked

"I was just thinking about the promise I made to her."

He watched me leave knowing that this was going hard on me.

Russell sat at his desk writing as he looked at the file. He looked up as I came in looking at what he was working on.

"I decided to help."

"Good."

He handed me the file and we started at that moment. I looked at the crime scene photos having flashbacks of that night. The nightmares started that very night and my appetite diminished.

A few days into the case I rubbed my head in the lab feeling my headache go up a notch as I looked again at the crime scene photos spread out on the table. I took my magnifying glass looking at each one.

"I remember this." Catherine said, walking in looking at the pictures.

"I am looking for something I missed."

"So how are you doing with this?" She asked

I sat back shrugging my shoulders.

"Okay, I guess."

"Are you having the nightmares?"

"Yes." I said

"I had them for a month." She said

She saw Russell come in seeing her.

"Cath, did Gil get in touch with you about the schedule yet?"

"Yeah, he said to come and talk to him after shift."

"Oh, he just said he needed to see you now."

She sighed leaving us. Russell smiled as he walked over.

"So I have a name. Robert Hall."

I stood looking at him.

"Robert Hall?" I asked

"Yes, do you know him?"

I looked down at the pictures remembering.

"Sara?"

I blinked looking at him.

"Are you all right?"

"I know him. He was the guy that was dating Mary's roommate."

"His prints came back on a knife."

I backed up from the table as he laid the results on the table.

"No, this doesn't feel right. He was cleared."

"Look at this." He said

I slowly walked over seeing the results. I put my hand to my head rubbing it.

"Sara, what is it?"

"I am just remembering that night. Robert Hall walking over and….."

"What?"

I stopped thinking. I touched the table pushing everything off of it.

"I can't do this!"

He came around the table taking my arms in his hands.

"Sara, I want you to step away from this. Just go and get something to eat."

"I can't eat and I can't sleep! I let this guy walk by positive he had nothing to do with it!" I said, my voice cracking. "I failed her!"

"You didn't fail her."

I backed up from him wiping my face looking at the photos on the floor.

"She made me promise to find her killer."

He walked over pulling me against him. I cried feeling the regret spill out. He held me worried.

I sat outside on the curb where I sat after the explosion. My eyes looked straight ahead. Grissom walked over slowly noting how tired I looked. He sat down beside me in silence.

He looked up at the stars then he looked at me. His hand touched mine in my lap. I looked down at his hand then I looked at him.

"I thought I would find you here." He said

I looked down taking a shaky breath.

"Do you remember the explosion?"

"Yes." He said, looking at me.

"I feel like I am there."

"You're not there, you're with me."

I looked at him as he searched mine.

"I messed up." I said "I should have seen it."

"You didn't mess up."

I stood looking at him.

"How can you say that?"

He stood sighing.

"Sara, I understand you feel like you are letting Mary down. I had that happen once, but you need to get beyond that guilt and put your mind to good use."

"No emotions. That is what you told me once."

"Yes, I did."

"I can't be a statue like you. I am human, Grissom."

"You are letting yourself lose control."

"I am just facing the truth. I failed that poor girl! I did, and no matter how you spin this, Grissom, it's still on me!" I said, glaring at him.

He just looked at me.

"I was there! I did it, and now I have to accept that I failed!"

I wiped my cheek angry as I sniffed. Grissom stepped closer to me touching my cheek. I looked at him.

He pulled me against him as I cried against his shoulder.

I lifted my head looking at him again. He wiped a tear down my cheek.

"This has hit you hard. I see how lost you feel."

"It hurts inside." I said

"Let me talk to Russell, about getting you off this."

I sniffed shaking my head.

"I should help him."

"No, you need out of this."

"Please, just let me do this." I said

I walked back into the building with Grissom following me. I wiped a tear off my cheek as I entered Russell's office seeing him stand.

"Um…I am ready to…work." I said

"No, I don't think you should." Russell said

I looked behind me seeing Grissom standing at the door watching us.

"I have to."

Russell sighed looking over my shoulder at Grissom.

"It's important." I said

"Brass went out to get Robert Hall. Until he finds him we all should go home and be ready next shift."

"Good idea." Grissom said

"I would like to stay." I said "Maybe I can find something else."

"Sara, it's almost end of shift." Grissom said

"I can't sleep. Nightmares."

"Grissom's right." Russell said

I sighed nodding. We went home. I skipped eating for bed. Grissom laid down beside me holding me as I tried to sleep. As expected another nightmare hit me. Grissom sat up as I ran to the bathroom throwing up. He came in seeing I was just doing dry heaves.

I started to cry holding myself in a ball as he pulled me against him trying to help me. The next day he came out of the bedroom seeing me moving very slowly drinking coffee looking very pale and tired.

"Sara, you look really sick." He said, very concerned as he looked me up and down.

"I'll be fine." I said

"Have you eaten?"

I shook my head sitting on a chair in the living room.

"I'll make you something."

"No, I am not hungry." I said

"How about some toast?"

"Leave me alone!" I screamed, standing. He just stood there in a stunned silence. I rubbed my head walking to the bedroom.

He drove me to the lab in silence. I got out feeling his eyes on me. Russell came out of the building to meet us. He too looked at me with concern.

"Sara, you…."

"Save it, what do we have?"

"Brass brought Robert in this morning."

"Good." I said "We can question him."

"Why don't I handle that?"

I gave him a look as Grissom looked at me.

"I told you I would help. Now you're telling me I can't?"

"Sara, I am only…"

"Just leave me alone!" I said, going past him to the door.

"I have never seen her like this." Russell said

"I have, but not this bad." Grissom said "You go ahead and do the interrogation. I am going take care of Sara."

"How?" Russell asked, walking with him.

"I haven't figured that out yet."

I waited for Russell at the interrogation room. I looked in seeing Robert talking to Brass handcuffed. Russell came over holding a file looking in then he looked at me.

"Ready?" I asked

"Sara?" Grissom called, walking over from the opposite direction. I turned looking at him.

"What?"

Dan ran over stopping looking at us.

"I'm ready." He said

I looked at Russell as he looked over at Grissom.

"Sara, I want you to come with me." Grissom said, as he stopped near us.

"Why?"

"Because I want you to." He said

"Grissom, we are about to do the interrogation!"

"I asked Dan to help me." Russell said

"Dan doesn't know about the case!"

"Sara, come on." Grissom said

"No, I am helping!"

Grissom walked over giving me his boss look.

"Not anymore. You come with me now or you will be put on a three week suspension."

I opened my mouth staring at him.

"I work for Russell!"

"Doesn't matter. If I see you doing something I don't like I can authorize a suspension."

I looked at Russell.

"You are in agreement with him?"

"Sara, you need to step away." He said

"What is it going to be?" Grissom asked

I looked at them stepping back.

"I have no choice!"

Grissom nodded walking with me down the hallway. We entered his office and he closed the door looking at me.

"Now, why don't you sit down and I will get us some food?" He said, getting out his cell phone.

"Am I a prisoner?"

"No, but if I see you out there then I will be very angry."

I sighed crossing my arms over my chest. He stared at me calling for takeout.

"Have a seat." He said, before sitting in his chair.

"I am not staying." I said, walking around.

"You're not going to that interrogation."

"Grissom, I am my own person!"

"You are my wife." He said

"So what, I belong to you?!"

He leaned back in his seat watching me.

"You belong to me, as I belong to you."

"I want a divorce!"

"No." He said

I looked at the door, then at him.

"This may shock you, but I care about your wellbeing." He said, calmly.

"I am leaving." I said, going to the door.

"Leave and you will get suspended."

I stopped turning looking at him.

"Four weeks."

"It was three!"

"I added one."

"You can't do that!"

He picked up a pen off his desk playing with it.

"Grissom, why are you doing this?" I asked, walking over to his desk.

"Because I love you." He said

I felt a tear go down my cheek. I walked over to the wall leaning against it as Grissom continued to play with a pen watching me.

The food came and Grissom laid it out looking over at me. I stared at the door.

"I got you vegetarian lasagna." He said

I shook my head.

"You need to eat."

"I am not hungry." I said

He walked over as I looked at him. He touched my arms feeling me tremble.

"Grissom, I am not going to eat."

"If you eat I will let you go without a fight." He said

I looked over at the food then at him.

"Suspension off the table?" I asked

"Yes."

I nodded walking over sitting down. He gave me a napkin as I dug into the food. I ate a little, then I said I was full. Grissom looked at everything not satisfied, but he was relieved I ate. I stood winching touching my stomach.

"I can go now?"

"If you want."

I nodded moving to the door. He watched me leave quickly. Russell and Dan stood out in the hallway as I ran over.

"Is it over?"

"He confessed." Russell said, relieved.

I watched Brass taking Robert away down the hallway. I walked past them watching the man being taken.

Russell walked over touching my shoulder. I looked down then I turned looking at him.

"It's over." I said

He nodded as I took a breath then I walked away. Grissom put his hand on my back taking me to the car outside at quitting time. He opened the door for me and I turned facing him.

"I'm sorry that I said what I said to you."

"I know." He said

I nodded getting in. He got in the other side looking at me. He took my hand pulling me to him. I closed my aching eyes and kissed him. His other hand touched my neck holding me close. He moved back touching my cheek.

"We are going to be all right now."

I nodded watching him start the engine and drive home. He watched me sleep next to him in bed. I didn't move as he touched my hair.

He knew I was dead asleep which happened often due to the long hours I sometimes worked. He moved his head as he slept. I moved my arm over his chest as my head rested against it. His cell phone on the bedside table made him jump. He reached over grabbing it putting it to his ear.

"Grissom." He said, looking at me then he laid back.

"Gil, its Jim."

"What's wrong?" He asked

"Ecklie's car blew up in his garage!"

Grissom moved in shock.

"Is he all right?!"

"They took him to the hospital. It doesn't look good. He was in his kitchen when it blew."

Grissom closed his eyes putting his hand on his head.

"I'll meet you at the scene."

Grissom sighed not believing what was happening. He moved making sure I was okay then he got dressed writing a note for me.

I moved hours after he left. I walked to the bathroom then I went out into the living room seeing his note. I crumpled it in shock and worry. Grissom stood outside of Ecklie's hospital room looking down. I walked over touching his arm.

"Hey." I said

He didn't talk as he hugged me.

"How did this happen?" I asked

He moved from me looking tired.

"Someone planted a bomb under his car."

"Is he going to make it?"

"They had to rush him into surgery."

I nodded hugging him again. I held his hand in the waiting room sitting in a chair. Russell and Catherine came in seeing us. Grissom joined them talking as I leaned back hoping everything was okay.

The doctor came out coming over to them talking. I stood waiting. Grissom nodded thanking the man then he turned to Catherine and Russell again. He walked over to me.

"Is he okay?"

"I have to call his wife."

"Where is she?"

"Out of town. He's not going to make it."

"Oh no!" I said

He got his cell phone out leaving me. I sat back down again thinking about what has been going on these last months and how I wish everything was normal. Ecklie died a few hours later from the blast. Grissom came home to change then he and I went to work facing the grim faces of everyone.

I sat in the breakroom as the sheriff took Grissom with him. He came back seeing the other CSI's in waiting for assignments.

Catherine and Russell walked in looking just as troubled.

"Sorry for the late time." Grissom said, looking at his watch. "You all know what happened. I will need you all to help out on this. We know that Ecklie drove to his home late then went into the house. The blast happened between two and two twenty. From this moment on all other work is suspended until we catch who did this. Catherine I want your team to take the garage and house."

Catherine nodded. I looked at Grissom thinking he was up to something.

"Russell, I want your group to go over the Ecklie's vehicle. Find out the kind of explosive and trace the person." He said, then he looked at his group. "My group you are to work in the lab. If anyone brings you something you work on it. Find results."

"After today my group will be split and merged into Russell and Catherine's group. The sheriff has asked me to take over Ecklie's post for now. If you need anything come see me or these two."

I gave him my best shocked look as he looked over at me.

"Let's move." He said

Everyone went except me. I walked over as he talked to Catherine then he looked at me.

"What are you doing?" I asked

"Working." He said, before going.

We went to the scene which was shocking. Half the house was burnt and the garage was horrible. We took the car to the garage going over it. Russell handed me the bomb piece attached to the belly of the car. I took it walking to a lab room setting it on the table looking at it.

I found a number and gave it to Grissom's group. Grissom walked in as I still looked at the bomb alone.

I looked at him as he walked over looking at the bomb.

"How are you doing?" He asked

"This bomb is made to blow up large things like a building. It has enough room inside to store a lot of explosives. Enough to take out one building."

"They didn't use that much."

"No, but they could have." I said

He sighed looking at me.

"So are you going to take this position full time?" I asked

"I think so." He said "Would you mind?"

"No, this is your decision."

"No, this is our decision." He said

"You are a great supervisor, but you could be a great assistant director."

"I would be able to get things for the lab."

"Exactly." I said, smiling.

He nodded smiling at me. I touched his arm.

"I like when you wear suits."

"Oh, that's right I would have to wear a suit." He said "I might have to say no."

I hit his arm making him chuckle.

"Listen to us joking when Ecklie just died. It feels wrong."

"I know."

He walked out leaving me to work. We came home after a long night. Grissom sat on the bed reading a book as I climbed over him smiling. He put his book down looking at me.

"This has been a bad day for you." I said

"Yes, it has. I spent several hours in my office talking to Ecklie's wife. They had been living apart."

"I didn't know that."

"No one knew."

"I guess he chose to keep that private."

He nodded looked down.

"Sara, I don't know if I am up to this."

"You can do it."

"There are a lot of things to take care of."

I touched his cheek feeling sad.

"Having Ecklie where he was and me where I was it….seemed to balance out nicely. Now I have to take over for a man that just died and it doesn't seem to balance anymore."

I leaned over kissing him slowly. He kissed me not moving. I moved back watching him open his eyes.

"There is a balance still. A stronger one. You are that strong balance for Russell and Catherine. As long as you are up there we all will be happy."

He touched my cheek nodding slowly. I hugged him against me wishing I could take some of his burden.


End file.
